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Monica

Bruised

Today was not too bad.  Good thing I stayed busy at work.  Was the exact day that our Beloved one departed from us.  The year seemed to go by so quickly but yet was so difficult for us all.  I want to thank each and every person out there that shared in our grief and supported us.  The journey of healing is not over but it does get easier.  As a part of the healing process, I often turned to writing.  I hope that this poem is received as being straight from the heart and encourages someone to move forward despite the grief.

 

BRUISED  by Monica Terry

20/7/2020

Dark scarlet resulted as capillaries burst underneath brown, supple skin as a result of the initial impact of the horrific injury. As the words, “Hu Neftar” departed from his lips I began to replay my life’s history.  What? Within 24 hours I need to come up with an obiturary?

Blue and purple brilliantly emerged with the tenderness of the skin that received blood into surrounding tissues as we stood and looked at the body before the funeral.  Reality setting in, nociceptors delayed sending a proper signal that was computable.  Stop!  Aren’t there loopholes in the CNS for situations so Immutable?

Pale green didn’t want to show itself so quickly, because that would mean time marching on without him here; as birthdays, Bar Mitzvahs, graduations occur and we all try to persevere.  Is time speeding up?  Maybe he knew the end was very near.  I would like to think that when he was brought back that he said, “Peace out Ya’ll, keep faith, nothing to fear”.

Yellow-brown introduces a new reality as old hemoglobin is absorbed and we make an attempt not to show the discoloration.  The fear that the old and new friends when we speak of him may think it’s an unhealthy fixation.  Really?  And I ask that with a bit of indignation.

Eventually, I know without a doubt that a Pure brown will emerge again, and perhaps other bruises will appear to join the colorful array on our skin; each one’s dermis displaying what phase we are currently in.  It’s bruises that make us who we are so we rise to win……time…. time….and time again.

 

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Photo credit:  Lifeat139a

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Monica

Say Their Names

After tragedy strikes, yellow tape stripped away

Broken lives, dreams shattered, discontinued birthday

Bad news, knock on the door, “Mam we have news to relay”

SAY THEIR NAMES

Someone’s son, father, wife, daughter

Sister, brother, can no longer comfort one another

Loved one, GONE, a generation goes no further

SAY THEIR NAMES

Precious children, gutted aspirations, never to graduate

Stolen time to ponder, contemplate on life, or reevaluate

Holocaust proven by history, can hate be innate?

SAY THEIR NAMES

He is not happy with the bloodshed, innocent souls cry out

Those with bloody hands, punishment coming, no doubt

Prayers for perseverance, let justice swiftly come about

SAY THEIR NAMES

Let the fallen never be forgotten.  Let their families be comforted.  Let us see the day where we don’t have to say another name

of a soul perished from this injustice.

Psalms 119:50 This is my comfort in my affliction:

for thy word hath quickened me.

And Sadly…….the list goes on…..

George Floyd--Breonna Taylor–Akiel Denkins-Sandra Bland-Trayvon Martin–Alton Sterling–Philando Castle-Tamir Elijah Rice-Michael Brown Jr.–Aiyana Jones–Oscar Grant-Renee Davis-Frank Clark-Akiel Denkins–Gregory Gunns–Samuel DuBose-Brendon Glenn-Freddie Gray–Natasha McKenna–Walter Scott-Christian Taylor-Ezell Ford–Eric Garner–Akai Gurley-Laquan McDonald-Yvette Smith–Jamar Clark–Rekia Boyd-Shereese Francis-Ramarley Graham–Manuel Loggins–Sean Bell-Ronald Madison-Kendra James–Amadou Diallo–LaTanya Haggerty-Margaret LaVerne Mitchell-Jason Michael Robinson–Ricky Whidden–Chase Anthony Tuseth-Jamal Rollins-James Rich Jr–Gerald Hall–Terrence Thomas Jr-Anthony Eddington-Ryan Joseph–Marlon Lewis–Lavar Douglas-Earl Eubanks Jr-Waltki Williams–Redrick Batiste–Mark Hicks-Norman Gary-Bruce Johnson II–David Crosby Dowdy–Jason Stringer-Irecas Valentine-Abdul Artan–Terrell Walker–Richard Grimes-Jerome Harmon-Cloetha Mitchell–Kajuan Raye–Talif Scudder–Ivory Pantallion III-George Bush III–Erickson Brito–Darius Jones-Samson Fleurant-Dontrell Carter–Rasheem Singleterry–Andrew Depeiza-Ritchie Harbison-Darryl Chisholm–Joshua Beal–Ferguson Laurent-Keenan Bradley-Michelle Shirley–Terrence Coleman–Jason King-Thad Hale-Malcolm Hickson–Roy Richards–Aaron Ballard-Demetrius Moore-Deborah Danner–Darius Wimberly–Kirk Figueroa-Deric Brown-Larry Matthews–Jaguar Mathis–Christopher Shackleford-Donte Jones-Carnell Snell–Reginald Thomas–Najier Salaam-Jacquarius Robinson-George Richards Meyers–Douglas Rainey–Christopher Sowell-Alfred Olango-Oddis Colvin Jr–Keith Scott–Philip Hasan-Kadeem Trotter-Dahir Adan–Terence Crutcher–Nicholas Glenn-Tyre King-Markell Bivins–Terrence Sterling–Gregory Frazier-Sadiq Idris-Robert Brown–Moses Ruben–Jerome Damon-Michael Thompson-Levonia Riggins–Jaqwan Terry–Alfred Toe-Donta Taylor-Kelley Forte–Brandon Coles–Omer Ismail Ali-Kenney Watkins-Colby Friday–Sylville Smith–Kendrick Brown-Fred Barlow-Darnell Wicker–Jawari Porter–Jamarion Robinson-Demarco Newman-Joseph Mann–Korryn Gaines-And in no way is this a conclusive list-Say their names-Say their names!

For more info:  The Guardian-The Counted

A Huge Reason for the Police Brutality…..1033 Program

Monica

Do You Love Me?

A repost that I was amazed was still so timely!  A short poem from yours truly illustrating how in my imagination the Father may define LOVE as it pertains to His relationship with us. Do you love me enough toR…

Source: Do You #Love Me?”

Monica

Collateral Faith

It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything.  My family has suffered a great loss in that my husband passed away suddenly a few months ago.  I pray that this brings someone else some comfort in knowing you are not alone in losing a loved one.  I pour out my feelings often on paper to help to deal with the pain, but what I realize is that even in tragedy, there is a blessing.  I hug my children more and tighter.  We tell each other “I love you” a lot more as well.  My faith has been made stronger…….I call it, “Collateral Faith.  It’s the strengthening of faith that comes out of a tragic and sudden loss such as this.  It’s giving into The Heavenly Father’s will and knowing that he knows and sees all, for He is truly perfect.  Rest in Power our Beloved and we will only say so long for now.

 

“Collateral Faith” by Monica Terry, dedicated to the late Mykael Terry

Woke up the same as any day, rushed out the door and we said our goodbyes and even, “I’ll check in with you later”.

But shortly after a few short texts to one another back and forth that morning, at the check-in time, still no indicator,

That something was going very wrong

That text or phone call never happened.  Although I thought it strange and out of our routine,

I dismissed it away as “He must have gotten busy or tied up with something”. unforeseen

But something was going very wrong

An urgent request to come and see what befell him ripped me from dreamlife to nightmare

What are you telling me, stop, don’t want to hear this news, impossible to accept and bear

And something went horribly wrong

You see he left us so swiftly that day that even now reality is still settling in

My best friend, husband, teacher, children’s father and plenty more he had been

For him, we will always long

But to see the collateral faith that has been gifted from his sudden transition

That faith that is made stronger after our tragedy, making clear to us his mission

Make those he touched exceedingly strong

You made us all wake up, level up and believe with our whole hearts in His Word

We will remember him always, Our Beloved Mykael-M70; your story will always be heard

Throughout your generations lifelong

____________________________________________________________

As a family and community, we know that we must continue to live to ensure that the work that he put in for our Heavenly Father does not stop with Mykael.  We show our faith by continuing.  This was a huge blow to my family, our community, and family and friends abroad, but the faith that comes by seeing how The Most High has kept us and knowing He will continue to keep us makes us grateful for every day.  It’s the hardest thing we’ve ever faced in our lives as a family.  Mykael was such a great father, husband, brother, friend, son and teacher.  We will remember him always.  I would like to leave with you all this song that I often play in the morning while starting my day.  It reminds me of Mykael who gave his all.  For those that grieve from the departure of a loved one, you are not alone.  My best advice is to find those that you can share your story with and let your loved one’s story be heard; let their memory live on in you and be strong and of courage.  The pain never goes away but it does get better.

 

 

 

 

Monica

This Mother’s Love

A poem of reflection by Monica Terry “AKA” Taptutor

 

Anxious to witness your first breath, in constant dread of your last

Bleaching out the blood, coffee and red wine stains of your not so stellar past

Will turn entire cities upside down when you’re off the radar

Nearly fulfilling profile of a cyber stalker demanding you “Change that Avatar”

Fearlessly race up to save you at a mountain’s highest pinnacle

Ignoring naysayers, haters, and  fairweather friends with comments so cynical

Message to the ruler of this world, HANDS OFF, can’t have my offspring

Fight to my last heartbeat, breath, and brainwave; every fiber of my being

To make sure you feel THIS MOTHER’S LOVE!

 

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Thanks so much for dropping in!

Monica

Still Wasn’t Enough

A personification poem by Monica Terry

still-wasnt-enough

I remember being awakened on a warm Summer’s Eve to soft strokes at the foot of my Mountain Kilimanjaro and whispers at the banks of my Niger, Nile  and Zambezi Rivers.

The voices and the movements were unfamiliar to me.  This was another people.  Something different about the way they touched me and spoke about me.  I heard them speaking about how they would  pry out of me my precious minerals and jewels.

Who were these?  They did not belong to me.  They were not the ones that had taken care of me for centuries nor had an understanding of what I gave back to them in return.

As time went on, their softness turned to harshness as they touched  me; it went from caressing to groping at my mountains for my precious minerals, platinum, uranium and iron.  They bore so deep, ripping from me the gold and ravaging at my rich soil in search of my rich black oil.  Often I would smell the alcohol on their breath.

I wanted to yell STOP! But instead I tried to violently react with a sudden volcanic eruption that sent the newcomers scattering for safe ground.  But after the ash settled, they still came back.  It still wasn’t enough to make them leave.

I tried to deprive them various times of water with my occasional droughts, for I knew those that took care of me would know what to do. They could survive and adapt unlike the newcomers.  But it still wasn’t enough to make them leave.  Greed will make one madly blind.

They produced mining industries and forcibly took my beautiful diamonds, selling them to the highest bidders and forcing those that took care of me to grope and hack away in filthy conditions at gun point until they dropped dead.  100 million carats, and still…it wasn’t enough for them to leave.

Eventually the ones that took care of me began to disappear.  Many times, I saw them carted off in ships.  The times I dared to watch their fate, I saw them looking at me as if for the last time.  I mourned with them, for now my fate awaited me to be plundered all alone by the rapists with grubby hands.

After such disparity in socio-economic status, the ones that were left began to be indifferent to me.  They had been hardened and turned cold by the criminality of my stolen wealth.  My borders no longer provided them with what they needed…..protection.  They have tried in the past to revive my damaged areas, but the newcomers killed them.

The newcomers even divided me up into pieces and shared me with others that lust for my riches.  Once my rivers flowed freely from north to south and my mountains and valleys could be inhabited with no care or disputes.  There was even blood shed on my soil that I sorrowfully soaked up.  And it still was not enough to make it stop.

But now a new day has come.  I see the seeds of the ones that were kidnapped and taken away from me and they are strong.  They are fiercely growing into seedlings that sprout bigger into hardened trees with resilient bark.  They are saying NO MORE to my rape and my exploitation!  They are saying ENOUGH!

They are being heard all over the world, crying out for me, for them, for the wrongs that have been done to be addressed.  I see hope of my people returning to take care of me as in centuries past, and I will once again be a shelter for them.

I see that I need not be ashamed for being forced upon and defiled, for I was a victim of unthinkable crimes against me and my caretakers.  And finally, I am not alone in saying “ENOUGH”!

Monica

Recycled Capitalism

Blood soaked economic system, Private ownership

Solely for profits, Echoes ring from cracks of the whip

Old face Britain & Amsterdam, New face honors the Duke

New York’s stench from lies, Can’t mask the truth

Made legal to own African people, forced to build The Wall

Pillar of oppression, that Eagle, Babylon must fall

18th century slave code, Now born with bar code,

Auction block to auction market, 11 Wall Street Manhatten tortured souls sold

Stocks, bonds, mutual funds, Are we just derivatives

Of greed laden trades and transactions, Deliberate and annihilative

Auctioneer, broker, big board, Lehmen’s cotton,

Aetna’s insured slaves, Same players, different names & days, fleshly crops gone rotten

Sold to the highest bidder, Merrill and Goldman supply the collateral

Capitalism with a botched facelift, devil in the mathematicals

What goes up must descend, was never worthy to wear the crown,

be found blameless in these days,

Repent, seek truth, change wicked ways, be heavenbound

For the end will not delay

 

Monica

The Performance

Trained

Blistered

Feet

Engage

Shellacked

Layered

Wood

Creating

Beheld

Rhythmic

Masterpiece

One

Fleeting

Moment

photo credit:  Chicaco Artists Resource

Monica

What Are You G For?

G

 Greatness of His presence

R

Righteously judging between men

A

Awesome, His unconditional love

T

Tremendous forgiving of sin

I

Inspirational story of a People

T

Treasures of rain not fame

U

Unity of His he delights in

D

Deliverance makes end to pain

E

Everlasting GRATITUDE for His blessings, Cup seen as half full,

Positive mindset a must, Avoid negativity’s rule

 

Monica

Garden Whisper

This poem and mood was inspired by my modest window garden.  I truly miss planting in the earth and having a big back yard, however, sometimes you have to stir what you got!  Be grateful in all that the Most High gives and He will increase what you have beyond your dreams.  Such order in nature and as I observe the growth of my tomato and melon plants, avocado, lemon and pomegranate trees, although small, I get a sense of calm as I care for them and watch the progress made from week to week.  Did you know that since the mid 80’s hospitals began to take advantage of the calming effect received by patients who suffer from pain and anxiety.  These are huge sources of stress that damage our immune systems.  So, test this theory out on a stressful day and take a stroll through a garden.  Even consider starting your own.  Even a window garden like mine can be beneficial.  Isn’t your health worth it?